#468. Big plans for DS

By pascaljappy | News

Apr 01

Dear reader,

we’ve seen our share of excitement here at DS Central. Our first sharp photo, our first decent blog post, our first million views … The future looked very bright.

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Flowers for us

But, today, something even bigger has materialized.

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The Besssst

Our natural modesty made it hard for us to accept, but so many readers have repeatedly told us that we are the best, that we’ve finally come to accept it. So, OK, we’re the best.

But what was even more challenging for us was to fathom how many of you insist on paying to read our divine words and view our sublime photographs. Yes, Lula has erected a paywall, cheap and worth it. But the thought had never occurred to us and, frankly, we’re firm defenders of free access to exquisite culture and sublime photography.

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Fast forward to the future

But you guys insisted. Over and over again. We felt bad, but couldn’t refuse much longer what the market so loudly cried for.

So, from this day on, DearSusan is a paid-for website. But not just like any other. Since we’re so clever, we found a fantastic way of charging for views. One that requires no credit card, no login, or password.

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It’s art, I tell you !

You see, we’re not just brilliant photographers and brilliant bloggers, we’re also incredibly smart marketers. So we dug up Amazon APIs, had a developer create a hidden app for the website and you are now charged automatically for what you consume on this page and others. It’s all automatic, super clever and our partnership with Amazon ensures payment is transparent for you (you’ll receive monthly debits from Amazon).

Better still, the system analyses how much you have used the page to determine how much to charge. Up to this point: 38 cents.

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Here: 43 cents.

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Now, 53 cents. The photograph above costs twice as much as the previous one because it is twice as good.

We had to come up with crazy difficult algorithms to evaluate the quality of photographs. But now that they are operational, we can charge fairly and, as a side benefit, we will be giving a free copy to several museums to evaluate the quality of their stocks and charge visitors accordingly. That way, free museums will stop being free and visitors will be forced to enjoy the content more and learn better from it. It’s so exhilirating to transform the world so deeply.

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Crystal Clear

This moving passage and the subsequent incredibly well-judged misfocus just earned you the privilege to reach 83 cents. Say no more, we know how warm that makes you feel inside. With talent that big, the sky is no longer the limit. I’m glad you can be a part of it, if only for 93 cents of it.

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Grey leader

#AreYouHavingALaugh 😉

No need to compliment us on this exquisite article, but please share the best jokes you see or hear today in the media (in the comments). Some are just so imaginative, I’m giggling in advance. …

 


Email: subscribed: 4
  • philberphoto says:

    People of DS, unite! Pascal is not telling you the whole story. Not only will you henceforth have to pay to read its totally yummy content, but DS will be groundbreaking in another way: it will be the only site where you have to pay to write! The same super-clever algorithm will calcultate the “value” of your contribution, and, the lower the value, the higher the cost to the writer! So, please, please, comment on my posts, otherwise the *$%¨*! algorithm will flay me alive. Heeelp!

  • jean pierre (pete) guaron says:

    One of the best April Fool’s joke I ever heard of was back in the 1950s, when a group of Sydney City Council workers went with jackhammers and other machinery and started an approved excavation in the middle of George St (the main “drag”, through the central business district in the heart of Sydney). Hoaxers from Sydney University called the police and warned them that a group of University students dressed as Council workers were tearing up George Street. And at the same time, they went to the site and warned the workers that a group of students, disguised as police, were on their way to disrupt the job. The result, understandably, was chaos in the main street.

    Pascal – nice try, but you need to learn more about protecting yourself from spam. Nowhere does the article indicate HOW Amazon is to find my account. OOOPS !!

    (It gets worse – don’t ever go to the movies with me – I focus on errors that slip past the Continuity Editor – I find that vastly more entertaining than the plot of most of Hollywood’s films !!)

  • Joakim Danielson says:

    I’m truly upset, are you charging as much for a bleak b&w photography as for a colour one? And squares, do I have to pay the same amount for it when so many pixels has been cut away. Trust me there will be a revolution, a french revolution. 😀 😀 😀

  • Steve says:

    You almost had me for a moment there as I supped my first coffee of the day! Then I woke up.

  • Andreas Aae says:

    I firmly believe that Plans must be either Big or Secret. Otherwise they are not worth bothering with.
    While your plan is certainly Big, I will let you in on my Plan which up until now was Secret: As of first of April, I have coaxed Amazon into reversing charges for very bad pictures and comments.
    Rest assured that this comment and the crap load of pictures I could send you, could potentially earn me enough in reverse payments to finance the downpayment on my Leica SL…

  • Fran Oldham says:

    I had started to look for the “Unsubscribe” button before catching on….so I suppose you have to be regarded as successful!

  • Simon Roberts says:

    I’m still fond of this “documentary” the BBC broadcast in 1957:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tVo_wkxH9dU

    Simon

  • Bumpy says:

    Whilst DS is debating the merits of iPhone photography you have clearly missed the ultimate iPhotography device as described by my 2nd favorite photography blog:
    http://blog.kasson.com/?p=14249

  • GH says:

    Great site, great effort and great photography! 🙂 keep up the good work! :))

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